raging through pride month
June 12, 2025
Today I went to a workout class labeled, “Themed Thursday: PRIDE.” I threw on a rainbow top and headed off, excited to celebrate my queerness in a new space and meditate on Pride while moving my body.
But the experience wasn’t just disappointing– it was frustrating to the point of distraction. Instead of the benefit of getting out of my head and into my body exercise usually brings, I was mentally monologuing about how thoroughly they’d missed the mark.
I was the only person dressed in anything remotely “Pride themed,” and while I want to affirm that Pride isn’t just about how you dress, expression through your look is one way of celebrating your identity. Rather than feeling included in a sense of community through my outfit, I felt like I had “outed myself” by being the only person on theme.
When we were greeted by the person at the desk, when the instructor began the class, neither acknowledged the Pride theme. This heavily contrasted the studio’s Earth Day celebrations, when staff gushed over attendees in green leggings, and even held a raffle for those who participated.
I felt my frustration, bordering on rage, rise as I went through the movements while thinking of accessible actions towards allyship– showcasing music by queer and trans artists; making a statement of inclusivity to assure people who deviate in a largely straight, white, cis, thin space that they are welcome and wanted.
As the class ended, acknowledgement finally came– “and Happy Pride! Lily got the memo!” I couldn’t even pretend to laugh. Instead, I felt the lump of confrontation rise in my throat.
On my way out, I stated that I had expected more, explaining, ”Trans and queer people’s rights are under threat– it would have been meaningful to make a public statement of inclusivity so that we know we are welcome. It’s hard not to feel angry, and I’m not angry at you, but this was a total miss.”
When I mentioned my anger, it seemed like one of the staff members registered me as a threat. The lead instructor apologized, but when I mentioned the music suggestion said, “Well, I played the corporate pride playlist.” Putting aside my feelings that “corporate” anything will never be representative of Pride, a resistance and liberation movement, I said, “But that wasn’t announced, so how would we have known?”
This Pride and always, but especially now as anti-trans rhetoric and policies are being enshrined into law, and fascists are emboldened to terrorize both gender non-conforming people and cis women who don’t fit their definition of femininity, we need spaces and celebrations that are more than just performative. We cannot afford rainbow washing when people’s lives are on the line.
Showing up means commitment to real action. So if all you can offer is a half-hearted afterthought, I would prefer you don’t bother.
Here are some ways to actually show up for queer, trans and gender non-conforming people during Pride month and beyond:
☆ Engage in PAID collaborations with creators “in the community” – Pay queer, trans and GNC people to consult on how to bring inclusivity to your celebration or broader work, to create a curated music mix, to provide decorations, catering, etc.
☆ Make public statements of inclusivity, and detail how your company makes those values actionable – It’s not enough to say “We stand with queer people.” We want to know how. And even more than that, how you take accountability when missteps are brought to your attention.
☆ Donate to trans, queer and GNC organizations – If your company offers corporate giving or donation matching for employees, provide a list of organizations, preferably community-based, that employees can give to. Some examples include: For the Gworls, The Audre Lorde Project and Southern Fried Queer Pride.
